For my readers who don't know, I broke my ankle about 10 days ago and am now the bionic woman. I had surgery which placed pins, plates, and other fun metal stabilizing objects into my new and improved left ankle. Now I would love to spread the rumor that I broke my ankle doing something fun and exciting like skydiving, but the truth is, I was walking down the stairs to clean out the kitty litter. I missed a couple of steps and instead of falling on my ample behind (which has plenty of cushioning), I landed on my left ankle and felt and heard a nice C.R.U.N.C.H.
Until now, I have been so zoned out on pain pills and focusing so intently on taking care of my basic needs, that I haven't fully processed the events of this mishap. Now that I am coming out of the haze and reality is settling in, I realize I have had this underground pity party just bubbling underneath. So, I am going to let it all out so I can face down my sorrows and discouragement, pull up my bootstraps, and get on with life.
Reasons for my pity party:
1. This ankle thing hurts.
2. I have extreme difficulty taking care of myself. It takes all my energy just to get a shower for the day and to sit up at the kitchen table for an hour.
3. I just started a new job and it is an extreme pain to be missing work right now (I was just finding my feet and starting to make progress).
4. I need every bit of my paycheck and can't afford to go without pay (which is what is happening right now since I don't have sick leave).
5. I was in a great exercise mode, was losing weight, and now will lose a lot of the progress I was making (as far as muscle strength anway).
6. I don't know how I am going to keep up at work!
7. I will not be able to walk on my own for the next 5-8 weeks.
8. I have to have rides to work and have lost the freedom to just get up and go anytime I need or want.
9. I had to cancel my trip to Wisconsin.
10. Did I mention this ankle thing hurts???
Couldn't I have learned this "life lesson" without actually breaking my ankle? Obviously the answer to that is no.....
Now, I know there are lessons to be learned from this experience and there are blessings to be received (and I am sure I will be more grateful for these once I am back to my "normal" functional capacity). Here are the lessons I have learned so far:
1. We are all in this together and I need to reach out and serve more.
2. I am surrounded by loving family and friends and they have been so good to me.
3. I need to learn how to gracefully accept other people's help and love and service.
4. I am a daughter of God and that is what gives me worth...not my ability to multi task and successfully juggle hectic days.
5. Greater compassion for my friends and associates who struggle with physical limitations on a permanent basis.
6. HUMILITY (try having your commode cleaned out by your neighbor and see how much pride you can hang onto).
7. Dependence on Heavenly Father and my fellow brothers and sisters.
8. Greater awareness of those around me who have needs.
9. The joy of having a very clean house (thanks to the wonderful women who came and cleaned it up for me).
10. What matters most.
So, for each challenge and each daily struggle, I will be looking for the lesson, celebrate my small achievements, and keep pushing forward. I hope to report some valuable insights as the healing process continues.
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